it drove me to desperation. so helpless. i used to LOVE studying. yes i did. studying for O levels was never a chore. in fact i enjoy it. ok go ahead, call me crazy.
the stupid jc system destroyed my love for studying. good luck to everyone taking As. except for ppl in top 5 jcs. they are so freaking smart tat they dun need and good luck at all. this year's papers are bloody weird. sad to say, stats betrayed my love too. GP 2 was shit. 1 passage only?! wat the hell. yes, it's like watching my future crumple but i'm so helpless cuz i cant do anything. watever. study will or might not gain back the love i once had for it. time to break up.
finally i had good rest. good rest last night but loads of weird dreams.

i dream of her. yes her. i donnoe why. i was sitting in northvale condo's garden for no apparent reason and i was studying. den i saw her guy drove pass. ok, big deal. continue study. i was holding my boy's notebook and i realise there's this colourful page full of chinese words. instinct told me, it's her words. nvm tat, i continue to study, without reading tat colourful page. den out of nowhere, she came and sit beside me. ?!?!?! i donnoe how tat happen. haha. yes i was dreaming. den we talked. i donnoe wat we talked about. but she seems nice to talk to. =/ and... the next moment, i was sitting with her guy under this big umbrella beside the pool and i can see my boy sitting with her at the other garden. behaving like i donnoe wat. freaky. i woke up. so relieve tat it was only a dream. mixed feelings. wat is this dream trying to tell me? wat was tat page of colourful chinese words? big umbrella?! wth?

ok den i went back to sleep. this time, i dreamt of sister Huimin. haha. she's nice. :) den we were on train going to Funan or Sim lim or smth. she asked abt my mom and stuff... nice talking to her. den we split ways cuz she had to do smth.. i walked around the place for a while... den i saw JOYCE!! wahaha. den she was holding a blue ipod nano. haha. den she told me she got it for free. somemore she can choose colour. but why on earth blue?! haha. it was quite ugly lah... den i went hunting for the shop to change my nano to black. den i woke up.
ahhh. siao. this is nonsensical.